My uncle

In a restaurant on top of Komtar, i was on my stepsister's wedding. A familiar voice was floating in the air. One has to know, on a Chinese wedding, those who are dare enough to go on stage and sing are usually not very good in singing, they always are some old people, drunk and doing some no-senses on the stage. Their voice are always terrible, but nobody would listen to them anyway, while the people below the stage are busy 'yam seng' -ing. Due to social pressure, i always put a smile on my face while i am so damn bored deep inside.

However it was not the case this time. It was a rather a good voice. My attention was immediately drew to the stage. The singer was my uncle! I am amazed, truly amazed. I'd known he was in a band, he was a bassist, but i'd never known he could sing very well. I can't remember anymore what song he was singing, but i really enjoyed the moment.

He died in 2009, while i was in France. He was playing with his band in Langkawi that night. He friends said he went to the resting room, after they finished performing. He was discovered dead in that room the next morning. Doctor said it was a cardiac attack. My mom was so sad when she called me and told me the news. She didn't cry but i could sense her sadness in her voice, which made me feel so guilty, because i was rather indifferent than sad for the lost. So guilty that i felt i must do something to commemorate him. I forced myself to be vegetarian for a week.

My uncle was the only sibling of my mom, it is totally understandable that my mom was particularly sad. Unlike my mom, i wasn't very attached to him. In fact, he used to be a mystery to me. I only knew him from what my mom told me. I was never sure about what he did for living. He sometimes was selling water filters, sometimes selling insurance, sometimes helping his friend taking care of an underground casino with some commission. In the matter of fact, i can say his full time job was a musician. He played in band of four, in various bars and pubs. 

He is a very kind and generous person. May be too kind and too generous. Too generous because whenever he got money, he would spend all the money on his entourages and his friends, rather than saving some for his own uses. From what i remember, he always invited me and my family for some decent meals, and he always bought things for us whenever he paid us a visit. Too kind because he believed in people so easily, that he got cheated so many times by his so-called 'friends'.

My mom always complained to me about him. Often my mom scolded him for buying us all those useless stuffs, told him to save the money for his own uses, and find a better job than playing in a band. It was hard to be a full time musician during his time. His job wasn't stable at all. It varied through out the year. Sometimes he would be jobless for quite a long time. Without income and control on expenses, it was a really hard time during the job-drought.  Most probably, it was also the main reason of his divorce a few years before his death.

I am so sorry, that i always looked him down when he was alive. I wished i could tell him how much i enjoyed his singing on that wedding night. At midst the noise of glasses clinging each other and people's laugh, i wished i could tell him, i was listening.

My uncle on the left, and Lim Guan Eng on the right.
This photo is at least 4 years old, Lim Guan Eng was much thinner that time.

My uncle and his band, the Blue Star band.
He had been in a few different bands before.